Applying for a US visa on SA passport

Recently I had my UK passport stolen and had to fly out to the USA 2 weeks later. I was in Botswana at the time of the theft so I really had pressure.

I was able to apply online for an appointment at the US Consulate General in Cape Town and initially it said the earliest appointment was 4 November. I needed to get it done way sooner than that. I phoned the US Consulate General later that day and was advised that the booking slots had changed and I could get to them on 31 October. First lesson to learn:

Outsurance R400 promotion is a farce

Okay, so the heading is a bit sensationalist but it gets the attention it requires.

Basically, I am venting, and what better forum to vent than on my personal blog with its tens of thousands of visits?

Outsurance is so confident that it can offer you the cheapest premium around that it to give R400 to anyone who doesn't receive a cheaper quote from Outsurance.

Their text is as follows:

We are prepared to pay anybody R400 cash if we are unable to beat his/her current car insurancepremium when quoted on a like-for-like basis. It’s quite simple, if our quote on your car is more expensive than what you’re currently paying and you decide not to switch your insurance to us, you get cash. If we are cheaper, you get cash through your monthly savings with us. It’s a win-win situation for anyone that is not already an OUTsurance client.


The important bit is this: "if our quote on your car is more expensive than what you're currently paying and you decide not to switch your insurance to us, you get cash."

When I phoned Outsurance to get a quote on my car, I was given a price of R50 more per month than my current premium with their competitor, and told them I had a comparative quote from King Price Insurance for R300 cheaper per month. I genuinely could not understand the difference and asked the call centre agent - Julian - to help me get a lower premium.

Julian was adamant that I should not consider King Price. He threw arguments at me about how King Price is an unknown entity because I've never had a policy with them before and they are new upstarts and so on. I responded by saying I've never had a policy with Outsurance either so they're also an unknown entity for me and if Outsurance is - by his reasoning - so spectacular now then it must be remembered that they also had humble beginnings so I could not ignore King Price possibly growing into the same perceived league domination as Outsurance has today. I then said if Outsurance can't beat my current premium, I want the cash.

Julian simply refused to pay out, saying I had obtained a quote last year so I can't qualify for it again. I pointed out last time the quote was around five Rand cheaper so I didn't move across to Outsurance because it wasn't worth the admin and pain. Julian insisted I don't qualify again, and I said I have never qualified before - am I now being penalised because a few months ago I chose to not move across to Outsurance so I am disqualified now from getting the payout?

After a long and draining argument with Julian growing incredibly rude and cocky, I spoke to his call centre manager (Karl) and obtained some explanation that the last quote was received within the past 186 days (six months) which disqualifies me from getting a payout.

I don't understand how that's possible since I have never qualified before but there you have it - if you have ever received a quote from Outsurance up to six months prior - regardless of whether it was more or less - you cannot qualify for the R400 payout.

I wonder if I get my wife to phone in whether it will still reflect on their system...

Brattex's Super 15 calendar is more popular than the real thing!

I can't even make these things up if I tried - my Super 15 Rugby Calendar seems to have become more popular than the real SUPERXV.COM fixtures site. Check it out:

My 11,600th day on Earth!

Crack out the bubbly and get your party hats on because tomorrow (Saturday 4 December) is my 11,600th day on God's beautiful green Earth! Yes, that's right! I'm turning 11,600 days old tomorrow!

Face painting for FWC.

There are no more words. This is a sterling effort. Good job Lauren!!!

Flagging concerns for South Africa

By now you know how much I get annoyed by the flag being the wrong way around... well, here's the official information thanks to the Southern African Vexillological Association.

In a nutshell: read it like a book, top to bottom, and left to right. Always start with RED.

i.e. If it's flying normally, red is on top (top to bottom), and if it's rotated 90 degrees, red is on the left (left to right).


SOUTH AFRICAN FLAG GUIDE

The National Flag must at all times be treated with dignity and respect.

The do’s and don’ts of handling the Flag:


The flag must never:

• Be allowed to touch the ground or floor. 
• Be used as a table cloth, or draped in front of a platform. 
• Be used to cover a statue, plaque, corner stone etc. at unveiling or similar ceremonies. 
• Be used to start or finish any competition, race or similar event. 
• Be manufactured or used as underclothes, bath and floor mats or any similar demeaning application. 
• Be used for any commercial advertising in a manner that will distort or show disrespect to the flag. 

brattex.blogspot.com is worth $4,000!

I recently googled for brattex.blogspot.com (not in a vane ego-stroking venture, but to see if the site was still blocked from dodgy people) and discovered this as one of the links:

Site Analysis of brattex.blogspot.com



Estimated value: $4,392

http://www.strategicfirst.com/brattex.blogspot.com/

Really quite flattering, and probably inaccurate too ... I think it's probably based on $1 per visitor. Here's another valuation for my website (http://www.serpanalytics.com/sites/brattex.blogspot.com):

Approx. monthly SE traffic cost equivalent: $101.06
And apparently the post on "most expensive laptop" is worth about $97.69 in advertising?? Seems maybe I should consider becoming a google advertisement associate...

Blogs gone private

Well it's been a long time since our last post to this blog: sadly, it's been two months of silence and the main reason for this has been that a very sorry group of people have found it worth their while and  (apparently limitless time) to scour through our blogs and extract any tidbits of information that they can use to harass us and generally just cause headaches. Yes, these people are connected to our High Court case, so it's no surprise that they've resorted to this nefarious (and based on the logs indicating their time spent on the site and their browsing habits, also desperately sad) approach in order to somehow "gain the upper hand". In order to err on the side of caution, we've had to take our blogs "off the grid" for the time being, but rather than keep you all in the dark, and because of popular demand, we've opened it up to a select list of readers (you should feel honoured that you made the cut!).

Don't expect much coming from us at the moment anyway, because we've been so used to NOT posting news that it's going to require some changes of habit, and also Kat and I are both presently desperately sick, so we're not really in the mood right now :)

A lot has happened in the past two months, and hopefully over the course of the next several weeks we'll be able to catch those that care back up to speed!

We are back!

Hello world!

Just to say we're back home from our USA trip, and I'm ready to crack it with some more posts coming your way - can't believe I've been quiet all this time :)

Warren Lansdell knows his place!

Warren Lansdell knows his place!
Originally uploaded by Brattex

BrYan Johnston

Gotta love free food!

God bless Micro$oft conferences!
Still nowhere near as good as XBOX360 giveaways, Parlotones live music, all-you-can-eat candy floss, popcorn, and all-you-can-drink slush puppies.

I like big buildings and I cannot lie

For anyone interested (thanks, mom), I am a huge fan of huge buildings.

I can't even begin to express the joy I'm containing inside me at the thought of going to New York City at the end of this year. If I had any possible way, I'd be going to Chicago too - even if just for a day to admire the buildings. This whole trip is my biggest dream; to witness the biggest dreams in reality! I can't wait!

In preparation for our journey, and to try and convince the missus that we should at least pop in at Chicago, I've been doing some digging for photographs and illustrations of skyscrapers in the USA, and came across some really interesting websites on the whole thing. Read on if you're the engineering type, or like big things...

My name's BrYan, and I'm a British Citizen

Happiness is!

I decided to make one last effort to hunt down my British Passport before embarking on the arduous (and otherwise expensive) application for a US Visa for our trip in December. I decided to go back to my mom's place one last time, and get passport hunting...

Where do old rickety dogs go to die...?

Quietly behind my reversing car, apparently...


I'm presuming that the educated and world-savvy readers of my blog (both of them) have heard of elephant graveyards and whale-resting places and all that fancy speculation before. Well, for old rickety dogs I guess it's the parking lots and driveways of the world that suffice for them.



Basically, yesterday I reversed into my in-laws' old labrador - Taffy. He wasn't there when I got into my car and I suspect he wanted to buy an opportunity of euthanasia and ran (he's been storing up his energy for months for this last break) behind the Palio to take the hit. All I knew was, I felt some resistance, like I was driving over a log. I paused. Went backwards again. Resistance. Paused. Drove forward. Looked around and didn't see anything (and considered it may have been Taffy, but he must have put on his cloak of "make-me-invisible-momentarily-so-I-can-buy-it-now" because I couldn't see him, so I went back again with some caution. Resistance. A log? Okay, just drive over it. Start to reverse again (no more than before though). Yelp! Stop. Go forward. Get out. See a rickety old dog sitting there pooh'ing himself. Get him up and he hobbles away, wetting the floor. He was okay, but shaken up, poor thing.



Sigh. Be careful. I suspect either dogs like to make an exit, or my in-laws tried to incriminate me by craftfully placing Taffy there while I was doing my seven-point safety check.

Is lady justice alive in SA?

Today we had our attorneys apply for a court date to hear our application. I have been most hopeful of an outcome to all of this bother over the past two years and was expecting a court date in the not-too-distant future so we could start this process and conclude it before I'm old and grey (which is approaching more rapidly than I'd prefer).

Well, I have a lot to learn, it seems. After hearing that the first available High Court date is in December, and seeing that this has dragged on almost over a year already, my enthusiasm has somewhat waned. We've been offered an amount about 33% higher than our purchase price for our flat, although I'm not entirely sure whether I'd trust the offer. Quite a bit to think about - do we take the sale and let go of this conflict? If that happens I'd feel a bit like David running away from Goliath. I feel like we have right on our sides, and with right comes might - but do others have the stamina and will to fight this? I'd spend every ounce of energy and every cent of financial wealth on this if I knew justice would prevail, and moreso, if it encouraged others to make a stand against injustice in the future. I will never do it at the cost of my family, but I know that provided my judgment is sound and my motives pure, God will sustain my family through this battle.

Back in RSA

I've been home for about 24 hours, and it really has been a bizarre reverse culture shock.



I arrived home to an empty house and felt quite awkward switching on the lights, boiling water in the cordless kettle, and using a toilet that flushes. Most distressing of all for me, being able to turn a tap and not only have water, but drinkable water!



The television was an issue I had to resolve with some prayer. I didn't simply want to veg out as soon as returning home, but based on the circumstances (my illness and exhausted physical state) I felt it was forgiveable.



The loneliness factor was quite obvious to me. Having spent pretty much every waking (and sleeping) moment with the team, it was quite an adjustment to come back to an empty home.



One other thing I've picked up - Zulu people, in general, are insanely aggressive when compared to their Moçambiquan counterparts, whom in contrast are very humble, reserved, and QUIET. Zulu people generally tend to be loud and determined, whereas the Picoco people are simple and community-focused, always helpful and allowing us to go in front of them in a queue etc.



All-in-all, living off pap and mealie meals for a week, having to pump water for washing, having bucket-baths around an old and used long-drop out in the cold midnight air, waiting for a gas kettle to boil drinkable water in the mornings, being grateful for a full moon to shine some light in the evenings, and long-dropping all seem to have helped me yet-again realise how fortunate we are on this side of the border. I'm not going to cut off my hot-water supply any time soon, and I'm sure in about a month I'm going to be mostly back to normal, but one thing I am going to change is I'm going to grow my own vegetables!



The experience always changes you; one week with the poorest of the poor, you can't help but be changed. Right now I'm struggling to accept the "entitlement attitude" so many jerks have in this country; they need only sniff what's going on over the border and then they'll change their tune!

Mozambique Mission

Two days into the mission "technically".

Started 530am on Saturday, and got going +-8am. There were delays (team waiting for the treasurer), VW TRANSPORTER needing oil, getting tyres pumped, etc. We were last in the convoy but made stop 1 earlier than the team getting the ZA stickers.

Our first casualty was Egg-poo being denied access to Swazi. Sent home.

The stretch from Swaziland to Moz was attended to by my co-pilot while I slept. When I awoke I didn't recognise the surroundings. Kinda did. Kinda didn't. Wasn't sure but we carried on. Eventually we found a sign saying Siteki to the right. I recognised the area but told the convoy to not turn. When we finally arrived at the luxury resort I realised we were going the wrong way. One of our team insisted Lamahashe was the right border, and another asked for directions to Goba border post, and both confirmed we were going the right way. I enquired about the description of this border post and soon concluded we were going to the wrong post.

Turn around. Backtrack. We arrived at Goba post at about 7pm. My Portuguese got us going so it was good. Rafael's Spanish also did wonders. We were through. Cellphone started to work again, and I got a host of smses from the others who'd gone ahead wondering where we were. I sms'ed and said we were heading to the YFC house. The girls in the car behind were getting frantic because they were exhausted by now.

I got us to the YFC house from memory - having shown everyone where Pikoko was on the way - only to receive an sms from Shannon saying we must go to Pikoko.

I pulled into YFC house and found Lauren and Debbie and Wes who were surprised to see us. At the moment I showed up, Debbie had just been asked to phone me because I was lost, so then we all went back to Pikoko in convoy and made it home and in bed by about 11pm.

I'd managed to get the team through Swaziland (once we ascertained we were lost), through Moz border. To YFC house, and then back to Pikoko.

On Sunday I had an early start (745am) and took us to the cemetery in Matola where we picked up Chico and headed to Elio's church.

Service started at 9am, and I got to finally do my sermon at 1145am. Hectic. We finished by 1230pm and have just come home.

Stay tuned for further updates.

Mozambique 2009

Since 2005 I've been going to Mozambique for church missions. I have always loved the experience even though it's physically, and emotionally draining. The spiritual side is amazing, so that makes up for it. Mozambique 2009 is upon us, and I depart TOMORROW for this momentous mission!

As with all missions to Mozambique, there's been a last-minute scramble by yours truly to get everything into gear. This year, ironically, has been the least stressful preparation for me, and maybe that's because I'm now a five-time veteran or something, or because I know it's going to be arguably the toughest mission I've been on yet. You see, this time around, our leader has decided that the only way to REALLY experience community with the people we're going to work alongside, is to live alongside them. That means, of course, that we are going to sleep in the community, eat with the community, and work with the community.

Why is this such a big deal?
There's no running water. There's no ablutions. The water you pump isn't drinkable. There's mosquitoes with malaria. There's nothing. Absolutely nothing. Oh, and there's this witch. The Witch of Pikoko. This "lady" and I had a very intimate encounter last year, which ended up in me being rescued by a Land Rover that DIDN'T STOP MOVING and me bundling into it with explosions and gun-fire and curses and spells and all sorts. But that's for another time.

For now, if you want to know what we're up to, or want to pray for us, here's the itinerary:

Also, I'm preparing to preach this year. Something new for me in the sense that I'm preparing in advance, so there's a lot of responsibility and expectation on my shoulders. The sermon notes can be seen here; http://docs.google.com/View?id=ddptrndx_31gh429bfc

Please feel free to pray for the team, pray for the sermons, and for good health and effectiveness. And also for the ones left behind, or for some reason or another couldn't go on Mission this year - and for those that are spouses and family of the missionaries.

Thanks guys! A te prossima semana!

Webpage typo's that are just ... awkward

Wow, did I just get a fright. I wanted to log on and check the latest score update for the IRELAND vs. PAKISTAN T20 cricket match (go Ireland) and did my usual "cricinfo" ctrl+ENTER and left it to load. Coming back a few minutes later, I discovered something a little less than expected...

Lo and behold. No T20 cricket score. Instead I landed up in

International Circumcision Information
Reference Centre

(http://www.circinfo.com/)

Now THAT was unexpected.

The sun, as reserved for smoking diners.

Today we spent the afternoon with my mom as part of the closing ceremonies for Kat's 30th birthday weekend.

We attempted to go to Piggly Wiggly's but they were closed, so we moved up the hill to the crest, and popped in at Woodrose.

I love the Woodrose experience. Chill outside in the sun, enjoy the atmosphere, and indulge in a lovely woodrose salad, or maybe a beef curry & rice, or if you're as daring as I am today, both!

The only problem I experienced with our plan, was that the outside area is also the dedicated smoking area. What does this mean for my culinary decadance?

Well, essentially, legislation is in place to protect patrons such as Kat, my mom, and I from being exposed to the cancer-causing effects of the nasty nasal-intruding stench of cigarette smoke. In principle this is great, but practice is a whole different beast: What this means for restauranteers is that by-and-large it's cheaper for them to simply allocate their already established outside area for smokers, and keep the non-smokers inside. It's a cheap and quick *legal* solution, but it does mean the non-smokers (by inference of the non-smoking habit, generally the more considerate of the two categories, but that's a moot point and not worth entering into now) are restricted to dining inside a stuffy establishment, while the *smokers* get to lounge outside in the lovely warm sunshine, and enjoying the "fresh air". Ironic, isn't it? The non-smokers are essentially the more likely to want fresh air, and yet the only fresh air available is now allocated for the smokers, who don't GET fresh air!

Let's think about this, smoking inside a smoking section gives you plenty of "free hits". Smoking outside just spoils the only pleasant air around the restaurant. Why should the smokers be granted the "exclusive use" of the fresh and open air? A smoker may argue that making it a non-smoking area denies them of some proprietary right, but that's not true. Surely it should be a smoke-free area, and if smokers want to enjoy it, they swallow their cravings, and go and sacrifice for a few minutes, rather than the reverse for non-smokers? It makes little sense to me that the non-smoker should be exposed to an element that is out of their control (tobacco smoke) if they want to enjoy the outside dining experience, whereas if the reverse happened, the smoker would be exposed to less harmful elements by having to go cold-turkey for about an hour if they chose to go outside? Essentially, smokers should make the choice - smoke inside, or dine outside smoke-free! The reversal of circumstances would leave little choice for a non-smoker!

That being said, it remains a smoker's heaven at the moment and non-smokers are the ones having to either forego the beautiful outside dining experience for the benefit of clean air, or risk a coughing fit and smelly meal in the comfort of "fresh air" outside.

Regardless, our meal was still great and I still vote the woodrose salad the best meal I've tried on the menu!! Highly recommended!!